Spider-man Spider-Man

Current Mood: sweet i had a thought
Current Music: Lets go Crazy - Prince

Once Again i am back to report the important hard hitting news for you, my fellow readers.

In recent news many of the important ceral figures have gone missing. These include the greats such as:

Tony The Tiger

The Trix Rabbit

Lucky the Lucky Charms Leprechaun

And Buzz the Honey Nut Cheerios Bee

All Four have gone missing in the past week. Investigtors are trying to figure out who would want to kidnap these guys. "I frankly don't see the point of taking them." Said The Great Mouse Detective Basil, "We won't pay a ransom for them. I mean how hard is it to find a child molesting tiger, a cracked up rabbit, and a hyper-active bee. The only real problem we could face is Lucky, he's the only one of vaule." All law enforcment are out on the lookout for who ever could have done this. Could it be another one of Snow Whites evil plans, no one has still heard word form doopy. Only time will tell what has happend to our great (well kinda great) cartoon spokesmen.

Detective Basil on how to solve the missing spokesmens case.

In other news, the criminal known as "Bert" went through some tough questioning about his meetings with Snow White. I was there looking and listing through a window as the questiong was going on.

Officer Goofy: Well now uh, Bert. You need to tell us what happend when you had that there talk with Snow White.

Bert: I ain't telling you nothing you dirty cop.

Officer Goofy: Gawsh, that wasn't very nice. I think i may have to fix you attitude just a little bit.

(Goofy punchs Bert in the face)

Bert: Oh you sick bastard.

Goofy: Well uh-huck, i didn't want to do that, but you made me.

Bert: (spits blood) I'll never talk.

Officer Donald: You gotta talk if you don't we could kill you. (note donald is very hard to understand so any misreads is my fault.

Bert: You won't make me do anythink White Devil

Donald: Why you dirty peice of crap i should kill you right now..............words i don't understand are used............and you're lucky that i don't want any blood on my hands tonight cause my wife Daisey wants me clean.

Bert: You have no idea whats coming and i hope when it does come you die slowly.

Goofy: Thats enough now. I don't want have to beat the piss out of your dirty yellow ass, but i will.

Bert: Kiss my big orange nose long ears.

This is where i am found and taken off police head quaters, but at least i got my scoop.

Bert with long time friend OsamaBinLadin (spelled as one word cause i can't spell it.)

I don't know where this epic battle of "your momma this" and "your momma that" is going but i hope it hurries up and gets there. This makes for great news. Tune in tursday when i exsplain the mystery of Strawberry Shortcake!

Current Mood: East Sideeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
Current Music: None yo biznazzz

This is the scene that sent the kingdom into an up roar. Why you ask? It's just Snow White eating and apple cursed by her stepmother you say. Wrong, that is no apple in Snow Whites hand, it's a bomb. Snow White has been linked to many terroist attacks in the cartoon world. There was the explosion of the Smurf factory that was quite disturbing.

Remains of the smufs after factory exsplosion.

I would have to say that this is appauling. No one would ever think that Snow White would do such a thing. But as the photo proves Snow White has followed in the steps of her evil Stepmother. And who took this horrid picture you ask, well none other then Doopey Ian Kandel. We tried to get a comment from D.I.K., but he was unreachable. Could it be that he was taken by Snow White or worse yet killed. I will keep you updated on all the info i can. It is my civil duty to do so.

Lets move on to a more happy subject though. Mickey's dog Pluto was found wandering around with two dogs, a Mr. Tramp and a Mrs. Lady. "They seem to have no comment," the sherrif of nottingham said, "they just sit there and lick themselves." I have this to say to the Sherrif, maybe it's because their dogs dumbass!

Now that Pluto is returned Mickey has gone back to the making of his new game Kingdom Hearts II: Chain of Memories. I am looking foward to this game like any other gamer, but that doesn't mean you have to be a bastard Mickey. When i ask for a comment damn it you better give me one. Fucker!!!!!!!!!

 I hate you Mickey, die!!!!!!!!

This just in, they have arrested one of Snow Whites Men. He is being held at the Olympus Collisum. I'm going to find out what i can, but for right now. Protect your family and your Children. The Police have released this picture.

The one in yellow has already been caught, but the cute furry red one is the one you should watch out for. I have to get to the Station, until then this is Sly McCoy with Cartoon Action News Signing off.

Current Mood: thank you
Current Music: Low Rider - WAR

After about a year of waiting the courts finally came to their conclusion about the Piglet/Eore Sex Tape. They person who leaked the photos was a man known as "Owl," he has now been sentenced to 4 years in a state prision.

Owl has been sentenced to 4 years in prison for leaking the pictures and the tape of Pilet and Eore.

Owl had this to say, "I am outraged that the legal system in our country can be so wrong. I am inocent i had a right to put that stuff out. I hope you all burn in hell." No one knows how the jury came to their decison about the case but we do know it was unanomus. The courts are looking into the fact that it may have been prejudice. In the opinion of the writer, you should never let a bunch of mice convict an owl.

Buggs Bunny who led the prosocution in the trial had this to say, "I can't believe i lost. I've gotten shot at, burnt, hung, thrown off a cliff, blown up, punched, and crushed. But never in my life have i ever lost. This is an outrage owl should be set free." A short time later Mr. Bunny was carried away to a mental institution. It doesn't look good for the cartoon congress now that Mr. Daffy Duck is at the head.

As for Whinne and Piglet, they are still together. No one knows why, but whinne stood by piglet through the whole ordeal, proveing onnce and for all that love concurs everything.

Thats the end of this Article. Read thursday when i get a chance to speak with the now shocked Jasmine about the acusations about her Husband Aladdin. And what is Abu really up to? Find out Thursday.

This is Sly McCoy signing off.

Let me start off by saying that my whole summer was great up until the last two weeks. Those last two weeks really kicked the crap out of me. First off i worked at MagiQuest all summer and it was really fun. I got paid 7.25 an hour just to play a video game. What is more fun then that? Well lets see, this summer for the first time i had females like me and not the other way around. I was approached by enough women to fill up the Circle Theater. But let me just point out the most important ones of my summer in a little segment i'd like to call, The Girls Sly "Fell in Love With" This Summer.

1. Reene Shaw - I met her at "Wild, Water, and Wheels" WaterPark. She was a nice girl with a great smile. I thought we were doing pretty good too. We went to go see Skeleton Key together and had a really fun time. Then we didn't see each other for a while, but we talked on the phone alot. I may admit I may have been a bit foward, but that was only because i really liked her. Anyway we decided to go out one day but her mother wouldn't drive her. Now before i go on i want to point out that every thing i did this night was to see her. I end up getting my buddy Colin to drive us in a little double date thing. We had to go get her all the way in Gardan City and i told Colin that i would pay him back for gas, Damny you Katrina. Anyway I take her to go see Lee Adelstone's Band. Agian thought we were having a good time, we played some pool and hung out. Then she drops the bomb on me, "i don't think we should see each other anymore." Now I have to say this, Guys out there when a woman says this to you never ask why, cause they will be very honest. Of course i know this because i asked. Her reply was, "We don't have that much in common, and i'm used to dateing more spontaneous guys". Now I want to ask all the people who know me, am i not spontaneous enough. All i hear from most of my friends is how spontaneous i am. Anyway i sort of took it badly i don't want to talk about the rest. She was a nice girl and i hope she has a good life. Wait no, no, no, i left out the best part, she calls me the next day and says i shouldn't call her anymore. She totally skiped "We Can Still Be Friends" and went stright to "Screw You." So i thank you for that Reene and i agian i hope you have a great life.

2. Megan ? - This may sound weird but i never met this girl, i must have met her at some point in time because her number was on my phone. Anyway i left her a text messageing thinking she was another Megan. She ends up calling me back and i all nice and wants to talk to me. At first i was like wow this is strange, some random guy leaves you a text message and you want to get to know him. But after talking to her for a while i found that she was a very smart, funny, and all around good girl. And although i've never met her i'm she and i could become good friends. It's a shame she's moving to Austin, Texas. Agian i hope she does alright in the world. Even though i do plan to keep in touch with her.

3. Melissa Warner - I work with this lovely girl at MagiQuest. She's a nice girl, very funny. I had liked her as soon as she started working at MagiQuest and i had asked her out. She turned me down, which wasn't really a shocker at the time. Anyway i forgot about her and dated Reene. After i broke up with Reene, Melissa started showing signs of attraction to me, which was cool, the only problem was i'm way more attracted to Tori Richerdson. I told her this, and i'll have to say she didn't take it so well. I wouldn't change it though i like Tori to much to just switch to Melissa. Anyway I see her every weekend at work and for right now were, being quite king to each other. Who knows how long that will last. I wish the best to her, because it's just a problem that couldn't be solved.

4. Tori Richerdson - I met this lovley lady a long time ago when i took Kara to prom. She was Jamie's date, and I have to admit even then I liked her. We had a good time and I ended up asking her out. Jamie freaked out sort of, and then we thought it would be better to let nature take it's course. Which it did, Jamie very stupidly stoped talking to Tori, where as i would try to talk to her as often as possible. But that still wasn't enough, we had talked about likeing each other, but some things stood in the way. These things will go unsaid but lets just say they were pretty big hurdles. Anyway I couldn't take it anymore really, I didn't want to just sit and talk to Tori it wasn't really what i wanted with her. So we had a convesation and we made up or minds and sort of said "Screw The Hurdles." So i right now were Boyfriend and Girlfriend, Yessssssss. A long term goal was completed, even though our first date was a flop. I told her about my past dates where they would say we'd go out and then after turn me down before the first date. She said she never cancel with me, but only time will tell, i guess. She's a great girl, yes she is.

Now that is just 4 of the girls i met this summer i met many more, but their the only ones who made and impact on me. So i hope that the school year is about as interesting if not more. And i hope that each of them i happy the way they are now, including Tori. Well that all for this one guys. Talk to you later, oh and i'd love to hear what you thought of this, and if you could be honest. Love Ya.

Sly McCoy

I wanna make you smile whenever you're sad
Carry you around when your arthritis is bad
All I wanna do is grow old with you

I'll get your medicine when your tummy aches
Build you a fire if the furnace breaks
Oh it could be so nice, growing old with you

I'll miss you
Kiss you
Give you my coat when you are cold

Need you
Feed you
Even let ya hold the remote control

So let me do the dishes in our kitchen sink
Put you to bed if you've had too much to drink
I could be the man who grows old with you
I wanna grow old with you

By Adam Sandler

This is for all the lovely ladies out there who are as into love as me.

Current Mood: Writing this whole thing
Current Music: Friends Theme Song

Okay you see this picture. I really have to say that this is akward.

This Photo was taken at a New years party and has just been let out. Both have tried to have the photo banned from the internet but it doesn't look thats gonna happen. "This is wrong and unciviliced," Eore said at a press confrence for disney, "we were just to animals caught up in the moment. Piglet and i have no relationship." Piglet who was not avalible for commenting has kept away from the camaras coming out of the court house today. We do know that piglet and boyfriend Winnie the Pooh are on the rocks. The two came out in 2003 and had plans for marriage. They were disneys star lovers.

Piglet and Winne showing how the loved each other at the Disney Channel Park Picnic.

Many Disney Charaters have spoken out aginst this. "I think this is truly wrong" Alladin said, when asked how he felt of the explotaiton of Eore and Piglet. "Their just two care free guys who got messed up one night. It's not fair to spread one nights mistake into a big deal." Simba took a stand as one of Disneys Supream Court Judges and tried to stop this tape from getting out, "we will do everything we can to keep this from getting out." Sadly Simba did not acheive what he was hopeing for. "This will be spread everywhere, for people have the right to put what they want out there," bugs bunny said at a Council meeting. Bunny is probly still scorend from the horrible sex video that was put out by his son Buster Bunny in 2004. 

Buster in 2004 Sex Video "Hunny Bunny"

Their is no doubt that this will go down in cartoon history as one of the most major scandels of cartoon sex Ever.

I'm Sly McCoy with Cartoon Action News.

Current Mood: contemplative
Current Music: L-O-V-E

Ladies and Gentlemen i have to ask you a question!!!!!

( Read more... )

Heres another one, lets see what we can make up with this one!!!!

Current Mood: just messing
Current Music: this friggin song

This who ever made this friggin song knows just how i feel. I love the song but the video is smurfin hillarious. Anyway you have to watch it, every single one of you.

http://www.big-boys.com/articles/everyonesex.html

I mean it too.

How the hell did the smurfs go from this

To doing this

I don't know but it looks smurfin awsome.

Current Mood: shocked
Current Music: None

This has nothing to do with Martin Luther King. Last night i had a dream that i was just sitting at home, watching tv. Suddunly i feel thiristy. I go to stand up, and before i know it, Koolaid bust through my wall, pours me a glass of him, and smiles. I said, "Koolaid what the hell is your problem man." Koolaid looked shocked and said, "i felt you were thirsty." "Well yeah," i say glaring, "but the door is freaking open. Fat Jerk." Koolaid gets mad at me he starts to yell. I yell back, "Shut up or i'll break your butt and cruch every single bit of you in to the ground." Once agian my wall is bashed down by some force. This time its a freaking pirate ship, cap'n curch jumps off yelling, "did someone say cruch" Now i'm just really blaring now, i go to punch cap'n in the face, when out of nowhere the Trix Rabbit and The Lucky Charms Leprchan grab me and hold me back. "Whats wrong me boy'o, you look a little flushed. Hope it's not from searching after me lucky charms." Now this dream is completly screwed up, even asleep i know this. So I do the only smart thing i could think of, called for back up. Tony the Tiger, my one true hero comes out of my closet grabs cap'n crucnh and shoves him in Koolaid. Wacks The Trix Rabbit in the balls and takes a Giant bite out of that little irish fag. They all run off scared, I turn to Tony and say, "thanks brotha, you really are Grrrrrreeeeeeaaaaaattttt." Thats when i wake up. Is that dream not screwed up or what. That is the last time i mix Soul Food and cold cereal together, i'm telling you.

The Jerk

Current Mood: chipper
Current Music: My Girl - Temptations

Okay folks it's time for another round of "Caption." Alright lets see what we have here, okay this looks like a good one, what do you think. What can you make up?

Kid: Damn, i finally get here and the doors locked. This some bull, i'm just gonna sit here just like this until someone comes by. Then they'll ask me what wrong, and i'll tell them the doors locked. Then they will tell me how smart i am and find some way to open if for me so i can contiue learing.

And My favorite of all time.

alright yall i'm out.